The Power of a Hug

The power of touch is amazing!  You can say a lot with a hand shake, a gentle hand on the knee, or a big ole hug!  Hugs are huge for us in our house.   We give them when daddy comes home, we give them when someone is sad, and we even give them when we're mad.  Yes, when we're mad.  Those are the best and the worst!  The best because they put a smile on your face.  The worst because while in the middle of making your really good point (that's really not that great in the big picture), the magic of that hug has now softened you and makes you think before you speak.  So, I guess they are the best and the best during a disagreement...ha!  

Try it!  I dare you.  The hug was one of the best things we implemented into our lives when we were first married.  My mother-in-law gave us a gift bag of candy kisses and a poem about the power of the hug and I will never forget that simple, but powerful gift.  We use the hug with the discipline of our children and we use it to set the tone for any discussion we need to have as a couple.  Some of the hardest things we've needed to say to one another have been communicated while we were embraced.  It's lovely and it keeps us strong.  

So go ahead, hug.  It's pretty awesome:).

Erika

Speaking Positively About Your Kids

At the beginning of my motherhood adventure I had a conversation with a friend.  We were discussing how we would vow to speak positively about our children.  I have been around several mothers who get asked the question,” How are the kids?" Too often the response is something negative.  "Oh, the kids are driving me nuts with their bickering" or "Oh my goodness the baby kept me up all night." I'm not saying that mothers don't have a right and even a need to express frustrations.  However, I do feel as though I hear this type of response more often than a response of happiness.  The way we respond to the,” How are the kids?" question shapes how people view parenthood and I want to personally paint a picture of happiness.  Is parenthood hard?  Yes.  However, it is happiness and my life wouldn't be full without my husband and our girls.

It is so easy to get into a back-and-forth about the difficulties in parenting.  However, I feel as though speaking negatively about our children hurts our relationship with them.  It's important in any relationship to keep private matters private out of respect and love for one another.  So why would we treat our relationship with our children any differently?  Not only does it keep the negative at the front of our minds, but our children hear and internalize those words as well.

I love my children to pieces and I want them to know that I respect and care about them and their feelings.  One way I know I can do that is by praising who they are and not blabbing about what they do wrong.  Praising them fills my heart with love and compassion for them and I know it will go a long way in the relationship that I desire to have with my children.

How do you answer the question, “How are the kids?"

Erika